Great Ideas for Parenting Toddlers: Teaching Orderliness

Believe it or not, teaching toddlers the skill of orderliness is possible and important!  In her book, Small Beginnings, Barbara Curtis explains that learning about order equips kids to one day create their own environment of peace, serenity and ease of living. 

In our culture, order has a bad rap. I remember a needlepoint that read, “A clean home is the sign of a wasted life.” However, healthy orderliness is not a rigid system that controls and wastes our time.  Order dispels chaos.  Order serves to smooth and enhance our chosen life values and activities. 

Creating child-friendly space can help water the seeds of order in our toddlers.  Children live mostly in an out-of-their-size world.  Consider how most kids react when entering a preschool classroom where everything from tables and chairs, the kitchen sink and often even the potties are to their scale.  They run from one thing to another with glee! 

Barbara suggests buying a small table and chair to place in the main family area to “provide a place for him to work comfortably, without being separated from the rest of the family.”  Similarly, a footstool can allow a child to participate in appropriate kitchen or bathroom activity at his level.  Try and see your home from their point of view—another opportunity to practice your skills of observation.

In addition, decorating with your child, not Martha Stewart in mind keeps their interest and allows them to participate in family space.  Put framed pictures they love at the level they can see.  I still vividly remember details of two Mexican doll pictures hung on the wall near my crib. Keep children’s books on easy to reach shelves in their rooms and the living room too.  While we can find stuff we want, children need easy access if they are to enjoy appropriate toys.  When we order the home with them in mind, they feel important! 

Have a place for everything.  “When a toddler is surrounded by order and when it is brought to his attention, he will naturally want to contribute to it,” Barbara writes.  For example, if a peg is low enough to hang a jacket, he’ll want to hang it up—unless there is a pile of jackets already “hung” on the floor nearby. 

Toy boxes and baskets invite chaos.  Barbara suggests white shelves, 36” high by 9” deep, where the children’s things can be put in small baskets or bins.  Teach her to take out one thing at a time and play with it as long as she likes then put it back before taking out the next item.  This takes teaching and consistent reinforcement.  Teaching order is about pattern and sequencing, a vital life skill. “You see, that’s how life really is, sequenced and orderly,” Barbara concludes.

How different it would be to parent a toddler with these things in mind.  When I understand the importance of developing healthy independence, I can be more patient with clumsy, little hands and slow processes.  When I understand the importance of developing a healthy sense of order, I can help by creating a child-friendly environment and training them for orderliness.

The next nugget from Small Beginnings will cover development of self-control, concentration and service.

- posted by Donna Detweiler, who has been on a quest all year for developing more order in her home and now realizes what’s she’s really after is the peace and serenity order produces.