Looking for Lemon Juice

I was making two dinners at once, plus preparing lunch for the next day (ultra-multi-tasking).  One recipe called for lemon juice, which I keep in a large jar in the back left of my fridge.  So I opened the fridge and pushed aside a bottle of something that was in the front of the shelf, keeping my hand on whatever it was to peer behind it. I saw yogurt, olives, feta cheese, salad dressing, vitamins and jam.  No lemon juice. 

So I pushed the bottle that was in my hand to the other side of the shelf and looked on the right side of the fridge; just cartons of milk.  Where was the lemon juice?  I always keep it on the top shelf toward the back left.  I pushed the “random bottle” in my hand back in front of the milk and peered in, getting frustrated.  The lemon juice jar would only fit on the top shelf so I knew it couldn’t be anywhere but on that shelf and I needed it now.  I could hear the garlic sizzling on the stove top, waiting for the lemon juice to be added.

I stared to stand up and call out an accusation of “Who took the lemon juice?” when I looked at the bottle that I’d pushed back and forth and was “holding” in my hand while I looked for the lemon juice. Yep, you guessed it…it was the jar of lemon juice itself.  I was so focused on it being in the “back left” of the fridge that I hadn’t even noticed that the very thing I needed was in my hand.

After rolling my eyes and saying a silent “thank you” that I hadn’t yelled at some innocent person (my husband) about the missing juice, I thought about how often something is right before my eyes but I become so focused on the long view that I loose sight of what’s right in hand.

Parenting can be this way. We can become so focused on our long range goals for our kids that we forget about the here and now.  Don’t get me wrong– I think we have to have long-range goals for our children.  Perhaps they’re academic (already eyeing a particular college), moral (instilling a particular religious belief), financial (wanting to raise a child who will be self-sufficient) or physical (training them in a particular sport).  For others, the goal of parenting may simply be “getting them out of the house in one piece at age 18” or getting them through the teen years “without strangling them.” 

Sometimes our focus is on the “end” of a season or time in our lives.  “When they’re finally potty-trained I’ll be able to…” or “When the turn five, things will be better…” is a common mom-thought and can become a goal that we’re focused on.

Serious or silly, years away or just a season of life away, where is your focus?  I encourage you not to become so focused on the long range or “someday” that you forget what you have in hand now.  You have a precious, unique opportunity today – to spend time being silly with your child, rolling on the floor, playing their favorite game for the tenth night in a row, answering their endless slew of questions, talking about what’s important to them (even if it’s about toy trucks, the names of the Transformers, or the large collection of stuffed kitties), fixing their veggies, cutting their food, wiping their noses and singing Farmer Jason.  These are precious times and will be over before you know it.  And you can’t get them back.

 Your child’s future – the long range – might be what you’re focused on, but take time to realize that the goal of parenting—enjoying each day with your child– is already in your hand.  Don’t push it aside looking for something in the back of the fridge.

-posted by Donna Venning, who knows that the cleaning, cooking and chores will always be there, but her five year old won’t be.