Here’s Kemp’s definition of patience:  “We are being patient when we work on something or wait for something without getting upset or giving up.”

Let’s be honest.  Patience is doesn’t come easily to most of us.  At times, I need a refresher course on patience as much or more than my kids.

True confession time.  Recently my extended family celebrated the 4^th of July out of town. Because we weren’t able to come along, I called, hoping to at least join in the fun vicariously.  No one answered the phone on the first try, so I left a message.  A day later, imagining all I was missing out on, I called back.  I was disappointed when no one answered again.  I left another message. I didn’t hear back.  I pictured them sitting around the table telling stories and laughing, without me! So in an effort to prompt a response, I called twice in a row to get them to notice my call.

Of course I got zinged by Jan’s definition of patience.  I was demonstrating the patience of a 3-year-old!  “Me first” is the tone of impatience.  I wanted my family members to call me back on my time table.  Now!  Not surprisingly, I felt ashamed when I got what I wanted by being annoying.

Yes, patience is a trait worth working on—the earlier the better.  Jan Kemp’s book has a creative, kid-friendly activity to develop the concept of patience:

On the first day, using construction paper, draw a picture of a butterfly.  Ask the child to color the butterfly according to your directions.  Explain the definition of patience and add: Butterflies must be patient to get out of their cocoons and you need to be patient to color this picture. Each time one of us is patient, let’s put a butterfly on the calendar to mark the day.

On the second day, cut out or draw a picture of a butterfly at least four inches long.  Roll it gently and place it inside a toilet tube.  Wrap the tube with brown paper, making sure both ends are covered. The child must not know about the butterfly inside.

1.  Discuss the meaning of patience with your child.  Explain:  Patience means waiting or working on something without getting upset of giving up. Ask him or think of a time with he acted impatiently.

2. Give him the green paper and scissors and have him cut out a green caterpillar. Explain: Caterpillars know how to do three things: crawl around, eat a lot of leaves and make a special sleeping bag. God puts these three directions in the mind of every caterpillar. We call it instinct when animals know what to do.

3.  Pretend the toilet paper roll is a tree branch. Have you child make the caterpillar crawl onto the roll. Use piece of tape to hold him to the outside of the roll. Use the toilet paper to make his sleeping bag. Very gently wrap the paper around the whole thing. Wrap until the caterpillar is covered by the sleeping bag around him. Make sure the end for the roll remains accessible so you can pull out the hidden butterfly later.

4.  Explain: The caterpillar must be patient while his work transforms into something special. He waits and waits until he knows it is time to work again.

5. Wiggle the roll like something is trying to come out.  Say: Little by little the caterpillar comes out from the sleeping bag and sees what he has become! Break through the paper on the end of the roll and pull out the hidden butterfly.

6. Explain: When we are patient and do what we are supposed to do without losing our tempers or giving up, beautiful changes will happen in our lives too.

-posted by Donna Detweiler, who is waiting for their house to sell without losing her temper or giving up!

Miss Meresa was born and raised in the Seattle area and has been singing and dancing as long as she can remember.  Her Mother says she just, “came out that way,” and it’s no wonder with so many of her musical family members surrounding her.

She grew up singing at church and school, as well as, taking countless tap, ballet, and other dance classes.  She also developed a great love for acting at a young age and pursued all three of these endeavors especially in her time at Mountlake Terrace High School.

Miss Meresa continued this theme by studying Vocal Performance at Seattle Pacific University, where she received her B.A. in Music.  After a little time off, she decided to do her own version of grad school and shipped herself off to Los Angeles to study music, theater, and dance at The American Musical and Dramatic Academy.

Miss Meresa also spent many hours during this time babysitting and helping out in her Mother’s Pre-K classroom where she realized her knack for working with children and her delight in nurturing and observing their development.  Miss Meresa discovered Kindermusik and, voila!  A great way to combine her love for music and children was realized.

-posted by Miss Meresa, who as a child turned her parent’s entryway into a stage (complete with bed sheet curtain) and made them watch her fully choreographed musical and tap numbers.

Your Baby:
Bring your baby into your lap and simply enjoy time together. If he’s fussy, rub his tummy or back in a heart-shaped motion, or gently squeeze his arms and legs in a milking motion. Sing some favorite lullabies. If you put on a CD, sing along. After all, your voice is his favorite sound, whether or not you sing in tune.

Your Toddler:
Turn down the lights and play soft music. Sit or lie down (but not in bed, because you’re modeling relaxing, not going to sleep!) and just breathe deep and enjoy. Allow your toddler to simply wander if she’s not ready to sit still. She’ll learn to relax by watching you.

Your Preschooler:
The urge to stacy awake and learn is strong in preschoolers, and they often need help calming down. Play quiet games: Who can whisper the softest? Can you float like a feather? Or a cloud? Listen to soft, soothing music and then lay on the floor and do…blissfully, quietly, absolutely nothing.

-posted by Miss Analiisa, who is tempted to stop working and go lie down with a good book… and maybe take a nap.

I realized that when my kids start asking to play electronics too often, it just means they need a little motivation to go outside. So I have come up with a little list of things that occupy their time, entice them outdoors and entertain for hours (okay, so maybe only thirty minutes, but happily playing children for thirty minutes can feel like hours to a mom in need of reprieve.)

Here are a few free or next-to-nothing activities to get the kids playing outside:

Piles of wood.  I pick it up at construction sites (there’s usually a dump bin that you can pull wood out of for free) or I go to the back of the local hardware store, to their lumber department, where there is “clearance” wood…usually 50 cents for a 2 x 4. Here are some things we’ve done with our wood collection:

• Leave it in the dirt in the back yard: they’ll build construction sites, cities, and forts simply by piling the wood up.  The older two will make roads for The Little Mister to drive his cars on. Once we used the wood to build an obstacle course.
• Buy some cheap paint and let them paint the wood.
• Give them some nails and a hammer (adult supervision if they’re young) and let them pound away.

Cardboard:  We go to our local Costco and get these sheets of free cardboard that we turn into all sorts of things.  You find this cardboard in between the “cases” of toilet paper.  Their warehouse-brand toilet paper comes in on a pallet and between each row is a sturdy layer of cardboard that is approximately 4 ft x 2.5 ft (other brands of toilet paper have a less-study cardboard layer that I don’t recommend for fort making).  Anyway, every time we go to Costco, we get a few pieces of cardboard sheets.  Give them to your kids with some tape, some markers, and a knife if your kids are old enough, and the ideas are endless.  We’ve built boats, forts, fire engines, houses…the list goes on.   They even invented a game that transformed the pieces into imaginary “islands” that we had to jump to.

Cardboard boxes:  Another freebie from our warehouse store.  After we check out, we check out the supply of boxes that are kept near the cash registers.  Last week we snagged a few boxes that are now serving as homes for two dogs (stuffed) and a Zuzu pet.  With a few markers, cardboard boxes can also transform into fire engines, barns or houses.

Rocks: One of our all time favorite outdoor projects: coloring rocks.  When they’re young (say The Little Mister’s age), we use chalk.  As they get older, they graduate to watercolor paints and then tempura paints.  Keep a small box of paint supplies handy and when the kids need something to do outside, bring out the box and let ‘em go.  If you play your cards right and collected a box on your last trip to the warehouse store, you will also have a place to store these painted rocks.  Incidentally, if you don’t have rocks in your yard you can buy them at a gardening store or, even better and cheaper, pick some up next time you’re at a park or beach that does have rocks.

Play Picnic: Grab a couple boxes of crackers, cheese, water and pickles (or whatever your kids like to eat) and have them set up a picnic for themselves (and you.)  I have a plastic tub that contains an old tablecloth, misc plastic silverware and plates and a few odds and ends Adrienne has added to the box.  I ask them to please set up a picnic for our afternoon snack anywhere they choose. Once you head out to the picnic they’ve prepared, be sure to bring a read aloud book with you; it’s a nice way to spend the afternoon and reading outside just has this fun feeling to it that can’t be topped.

My point in all these ideas is that sometimes your kids just need a little boost to get their imaginations going. A few easy to find (and inexpensive to obtain) items are all you need to make your summer afternoons times of adventure and exploration.

-posted by Donna Venning, whose children are setting up an outside picnic as she writes this article.  Now it’s time to go enjoy the fruits of their labor….

One of the most famous rat catchers was Jack Black, appointed rat-catcher and mole destroyer to Queen Victoria in the middle of the 1800’s. He wore a scarlet top coat, waistcoat and breeches, with a huge leather belt inset with cast iron rats.

When he caught any unusually colored rats, he bred them, to establish new color varieties. He would sell his home-bred domesticated colored rats as pets, mainly, as Black observed, “to well-bred young ladies to keep in squirrel cages”. Beatrix Potter is believed to have been one of his customers, and she dedicated the book Samuel Whiskers to her rat of the same name.

The more sophisticated ladies of court kept their rats in dainty gilded cage and even Queen Victoria herself kept a rat or two. It was in this way that domesticated — or fancy — rats were established. Black also supplied live rats for rat-baiting in pits, a popular mid-Victorian past-time. (source, Wikipedia)

So now you know what well-bred young ladies keep in squirrel cages. So, go find a rat catcher to lavish your attention and adoration on, and have a very lovely day!!

­-posted by Miss Analiisa, who dedicates this post to Buddy, the family beagle, for killing that rat under the deck and delivering it to her earlier this week. Eeeew!

The kids had a blast!  Violette, our toddler, was happy so long as she didn’t have to touch nature and nature didn’t touch her.  She is obsessed with shoes even before the tender age of two, so she may be a city girl at heart.  She did not like getting dirty, or touching the glacier, the ferns that would brush against her along the trail.  Funny girl!  She did love throwing rocks into water, though, and sought every opportunity to do so, even braving the potential dirt on her hands for the enjoyment.

The forest immediately captured my five year old Colin’s imagination, and before long the story in his head came out: Soon we were crossing the treacherous bridge and into the mud-pits of doom.  We had to be careful as the trees were spies.  The day was made complete by the fact that he also got to pet d 20-30 different dogs along the trail – he LOVES dogs.

Myles, as a very cool 7.5 year old, (too “old” for that made up story stuff) tolerated his brother.  Colin can spin a good story, and even Myles’ “coolness” was not strong enough to resist the pull.  Myles smiled off and on while walking, but he really found his smile once we reached the glacier and then the little boy inside let loose.  He enjoyed talking about what he had learned along the trail and asking questions about the world around him. On the way back, he and Colin found sticks and instantly made them into swords for “Battle Forest”.

I highly recommend taking a day and enjoying the woods and various landscapes our great state has to offer.  The Washington Trails Association has a wonderful site with links dedicated to Family Friendly Hikes.  I especially loved the article that discussed what to expect when hiking with young children.  Joan Burton, author of “Best Hikes with Kids: Western Washington & the Cascades”, provides much insight and wisdom on how to engage, entertain and even create a love for nature while hiking with children of all ages.

-posted by Miss Jesikah, who enjoyed experiencing the magic of the woods, rivers, streams and even a glacier through the eyes of her children.

Since they (like most kids) love building anything, there were ample building toys available.  Frazzled and desperate, I grabbed the closest materials at hand…those life size cardboard blocks that are generally red, blue and yellow and look like bricks.  (But any building blocks would work for this activity.)

“Let’s build something!” I said.

“Great!” responded my children, in unison for the first time that day.

“In order to get the materials you need to build your towers–” I began…

“I’m building a parking garage” interrupted one child.

“…as I was saying, in order to build whatever it is you’re going to build, you have to earn your bricks by saying something you like or love about your sister and brother.”

Blank stares.

“Kevin, tell me something nice about Adrienne.”

Tick tock. Tick tock.

“Kevin, what is something you like about Adrienne?”

Slowly, quietly, looking at me, he uttered, “Adrienne, I like that you comfort me when I’m scared at night.”

“Not bad,” I thought as I handed him a brick. “Good job…can you say that again, this time to your sister, not me?”

He obliged and his sister gave a smile and responded, “Well, that’s okay Kevin coz I’m just brave and you’re scared.” (Mental note, work on teaching kids to be graceful when accepting a compliment…but one lesson at a time.)

“Ok,” I interjected.  “Now it’s your turn, Adrienne.  What is something you like about Kevin?”

Well, I’ll let you fill in the rest of the scene.  It took about a half an hour, but it was sure fun.  For each compliment, they received a brick to add to their building.  The kids got more creative (and more sincere) with every few comments.  I had to assist them a little with some things, as they tended to say the same comments just in different ways (for example, Kevin stated about four times that he liked that Adrienne helped him not be scared at night) so if they got stuck I helped out by giving ideas such as, “Adrienne, do you remember if Kevin did something good at his soccer game the other day?”

When Adrienne made an especially nice and sincere comment about Kevin, I rewarded her with two bricks; that “change” added an element of surprise to the game.

You can take this lesson a step further if you desire, and actually “wreck” their building when they’re done. Tearing down what they just worked so hard to build really illustrates that one thoughtless or mean comment can destroy something so easily.  It gives them a visual that they can grasp. But be warned, this can also trigger a slew of tears from little ones who are proud of what they just built.  So, choose the right moment to use the “tearing down” version of the game.

There you have it! Next time you’ve had it with your kids bickering, insulting and fighting, get out the bricks and teach them to use their words to build, not destroy.

-posted by Donna Venning, who thinks building others up with kind words is something we can all work on. Say three kind things to your spouse today!

My daughter, a Kindermusik veteran since the womb, had a blast!   She sang, danced and socialized with the other children in class as if they were familiar friends.  The magic of the class was so great that to this day, one year later, her favorite book and CD she received from her time with Teacher Aaron is still her personal favorite.  As a Kindermusik mom going on 5.5 years and a Kindermusik Educator, I have a lot of CD’s and books in my house yet, she continually wants to read and sing her Play Dates favorite.

Following our musical adventure with Teacher Aaron, my daughter with much glee explored Soundbridge. What an amazing place!  Children of any age are encouraged to play with instruments and make as much joyful noise as they please!  The xylophone and keyboard were her personal favorites.

For $15, it was truly a bargain.  Not only did we get a 45 minute Kindermusik class, 30 minutes to explore Soundbridge, 15 minutes of musical story time, but also a book and CD so the memories and fun could continue in the car, at home, at grandma’s and so many more places!

You can check out our Play Dates featured for this July, and even register online.  Even if you do not live in Seattle, I guarantee it is worth the trip to downtown. You can even make a Seattle day of it!  Pikes Place Market is just around the corner, as well as the Seattle Aquarium; or hop on over to the zoo to round out the afternoon.

-posted by Miss Jesikah, who is looking forward to a new magical experience with Teacher Aaron this July in “Tub Tunes”, one of the Play Dates featuring ducks and bubbles.

We all have a natural rhythm when we talk, so like music, our speech pattern has a beat and a tempo. Singing in a different language can help learn how a language flows.  Our brains are fully engaged and stimulated when we sing and move to music, which in turn activates both sides of the brain.

Songs in other languages not only promote that specific language, but also gives insight into those cultures.  Singing in a group setting helps build confidence that is needed to carry on day to day conversations.

We get to experience music from all over the world in our classes, so adding songs from around the world at home is a breeze!  In this June’s World Traveler camp, we took a “trip” to Japan to learn a fun song about Panda, Usagi, Koala (usagi is Japanese for rabbit). See – you already know the “foreign” words panda and koala!  The children had such a great time learning the song and it was made all the more fun by singing it faster and faster!

Domo arigato to all the children who helped make this a song one of my favorites!  Enjoy!

-posted by Miss Beth, who enjoys singing and dancing to music from all over the world.

Parental perfectionism is a distortion of a healthy desire. A fierce love for my children propels me to have high standards regarding my performance as their mom.  That is normal and good.  But just like a tiny drop of red food coloring permeates a whole glass of liquid, a dose of perfectionism can taint my parenting experience.

As a new parent, I read everything I could on parenting. I was chock full of high ideals—the best scenarios regarding eating, sleeping, teething, playing…  I had lots of faith in experts and little faith in my ability to think and decide what was best for my children. For experts, things seemed so black and white.  In my home, life never fit into the scenarios described in books.  The perfect parent in my mind was like a nightmare housemother, constantly peering over my shoulder, criticizing, threatening, and berating.

It took me a few years to kick her out for good.  The process went something like this:  Get completely tired and discouraged, talk to my friends for perspective and encouragement, talk to some mom mentors, read less parenting books because of being too tired, start to trust my own capacity to make decisions about my children, keep talking to friends, begin to develop confidence as a mom.  Growing in my faith was a big part of the journey too!

If you are feeling beat up by perfect parent perfectionism, here are a few suggestions:

Work at balance. Life is not all good or all bad; it is a mix of both. A normal day has elements of both. That is reality.  I can celebrate the good parts and accept when the day didn’t go as I’d hoped, or I wasn’t the mom I’d like to be.  When I give myself grace to have good and bad moments, I’m better at extending that grace to my family members!

Recognize trouble spots. Anger was a trouble spot for me because perfectionism breeds anger. I found that I had anger towards my children because it seemed like I couldn’t please them when in reality I couldn’t live up to my impossible vision of a perfect mother. Other trouble spots can be obsessive house cleaning, withdrawal into fantasy novels, too much TV, depression.  Anything that is out of balance needs to be flagged as a trouble spot.

Find resources for help. Once I recognized my trouble spot, I began to get help.  For me, finding a mentor helped.  I talked things out with this trusted person.  This experienced mom helped me recognize my unrealistic expectations, which was the first step decoding the anger I felt. Other resources for trouble spots can be topical books, your own parents, doctors, conferences and our faith communities.  The prerequisite for finding help is often getting desperate enough to be humble and ask!

Ask your children for forgiveness.  This was the most peace-giving breakthrough for me. It broke through the perfectionism for good as I realigned myself as a fellow traveler in life with my children versus being the perfect person to my children. The first time I asked my kids to forgive me and to pray for me was amazing. As always, children are ready to forgive and comfort.  They have now seen me grow and change in areas of weakness.  Now I have modeled to them how to handle a weak area, which they will encounter too.  In admitting my weakness, I have taught my children more than I could be seeming to be perfect.

I’m learning that being a perfect parent is a pernicious myth. I can’t be one. My spouse can’t be one.  My children never will be either. I’m learning that perfectionism promotes a lie. Life is good and bad, wonderful and terrible at times. We have both strengths and weaknesses and so do our children. That is a balanced, healthy perspective. And healthy parenting involves embracing this reality and living honestly, courageously, freely and adventurously as we walk alongside our kids in community.

-posted by Donna Detweiler, who is learning that embracing “messy life” is way more fun than pursuing “perfect life”.