One such moment arose about a month ago in my Tuesday Village class in Kirkland.  Toward the end of class we were discussing birthdays, since little Kaitlyn was about to have her 1^st birthday party that weekend.  The discussion turned to birthday cakes and which bakeries in the Kirkland area people had used and liked best.  This led to the ever popular topic of cupcakes.  Everyone was quite enthusiastic about which bakery made their favorite cupcakes.

Before I knew it, someone proposed that the group have a cupcake tasting and suggested we could do it after class the next week.  I was happy to facilitate.  It was agreed that each grown –up would bring cupcakes from a different bakery and we would rate which ones we liked best.  Judy, Kaitlyn’s Mom, wondered if anyone in the group blogged since this would make such a great story.  I immediately volunteered to write about it for the Studio3 Blog.

Later that week, I received an email from Judy saying that a friend of hers from Currently Kirkland TV thought our story was so cute that she wanted to come film a piece about it.  What began as a simple unexpected conversation in Village class grew into a full-fledged media-covered cupcake extravaganza!

The following week, all were assembled dressed in their finest daywear; ready for the camera, class and, of course, the very serious business of cupcakes.  Camera Man Mike filmed us in all our Kindermusik glory.  Throughout class, every one beamed in delightful expectation of things to come.

Once class time was over, out came the cupcakes.  We ended up with confections from eight different bakeries.  The contestants were Trophy, Lisa Du Pare, Pasta & Co, NY Cupcakes, QFC, Cupcake Royale, PCC, and Pinkabella.  Many had other places and appointments to get to soon, so a frenzy of cupcake tasting, judging, and interviews by Reporter Pamm ensued.  Participants were allowed to vote for both favorite cake and favorite frosting.  After many sugary sweet samples and all was said and done, the clear winner of the day was, ahem, drum roll please, Pinkabella cupcakes, in both the frosting and cake categories.

After the sugary bacchanalia of it all, I was left feeling a bit woozy.  Quite frankly, I don’t care to look at another cupcake for a long time, but I am boosted by the fact that every one, both babies and grown-ups, were in high form that day, and I couldn’t possibly have been more proud of them or more delighted with what was born of one magical moment in Village class.

You can watch the final story, too! If you click on the link, you can see the episode right online.

-posted by Miss Meresa, who is looking forward to the next spontaneous and unexpected magical moment in class.

My sister finds it annoying. I find it hilarious. Of course, I’ve been-there done-that three times, and it’s been five years since one of mine played that game. Because I’m the auntie, I can call it cute and be glad I’m no longer scraping food off the walls.

What this all means is that 11 month old Macie has moved from the this-is-all-about-picking-things-up stage, to the what-will-happen-if-I, what-does-it-feel-like, what-noise-does-it-make stage.

But let’s back up a moment. I’ve got to get you caught up. These fine motor skills began at about 2 to 4 months of age, when she inaccurately swiped at objects. Sometime after 3 months, she could hold small objects in her hand, and within a couple of months, could transfer those objects between her hands. Between 5 and 9 months Macie could first rake at objects with her whole hand to pick them up, and then moved on to picking up small objects using her thumb and index finger. We call this a pincer grasp.

She’ll use this grasp to string beads, close a Ziploc bag, color, hold her glockenspiel mallets in Kindermusik Young Child, build Lego creations, and cut with scissors.

As Macie’s grasp became more precise, she explored objects by moving, twisting, turning and shaking them. Now at almost a year, she’s just about ready for my favorite classic of baby toys – the Tupperware shape sorter, which combines the rotating, moving and flipping skills she learned earlier, which a little cognitive thinking.

When she first learned to sit, Macie would prop herself up on one arm, and explore her playthings with one hand and her mouth. As she learned sit without help, both hands became free to be used to answer her questions about the shape, texture, size, hardness, and weight of objects. She’s using her mouth less (though a lot of children remain really oral for a couple of years, and that’s perfectly okay).

Which brings us back to the cup throwing. And the banging, shaking, squeezing, tapping, twisting and flinging. Is my sister annoyed? You betcha. Her living room floor currently looks like a tornado hit it. So does Macie’s room. And the dining room. And sometimes even the bathroom. (And even the hallway, which occasionally gets mummified by an unwound roll of toilet paper.

But rather than get angry when our babes make a mess, keep this in mind: You already know what a balloon does when you kick it, what noise a cup makes when you throw it, just how fast you can unwind toilet paper (and how long it is!), how scratchy brush bristles feel on your skin – but your little one doesn’t. Someone, long ago, let you taste, touch, feel and manipulate objects. And then helped you learn how to pick up your tornado.

­-posted by Miss Analiisa, who suggests you make an ever-changing sensory box filled with varied objects like a sponge, a wooden spoon, a rock, a piece of sandpaper, a feather duster, and egg shaker, a pan lid, a real flower, a jingle bell stick and a stuffed animal for you to explore together.

You see, my morning tea is supposed to be sipped slowly while sitting at the dining room table reading the celebrity gossip, err… news on my iPad. No rushing allowed. Without my tea, I was seriously out of sorts all morning long. (And it wasn’t the lack of caffeine; I only have one cup.)

If you’re not a morning beverage have-to drinker, perhaps you’ve sat down to watch your favorite TV show, and discovered it was on hiatus? Bet you turned into cranky pants. We grown-ups grow accustomed to our routines and rituals, and it can be aggravating and unsettling to be jolted out of them!

We’re born with a need for routine and ritual. Predictability is important to an infant, a toddler, a pre-schooler, a jr. higher, and adults. We like to know what comes next. It brings us comfort and security and makes us feel like we are in control of our circumstances.

Routines are the tasks or chores we regularly do. They are the typical or everyday activities that have little afterthought. Your workplace has a typical routine. (Think about what you do in your job, or what are the normal procedures you follow without really thinking about them.) I do laundry on Fridays, always lock the door when I leave the house, and start with long tones when I practice my Euphonium.

Your children need routines, too. In Kindermusik, we always start with the hello song and end with the goodbye song. Routines in the classroom allow children to feel safe and secure, and then learning can happen naturally.
Routines help babies solidify their eating and sleeping patters; routine transitions and rituals help preschoolers feel in control, and knowing what to expect enables them to act independently.

There is an interesting difference between routines and rituals. According to Stedman’s Medical Dictionary, a ritual is a detailed act or series of acts carried out by an individual to relieve anxiety or to forestall the development of anxiety.

That makes perfect sense. My morning tea ritual gives me a moment of peace before I enter the hectic pace of my day. It grounds me. The routine of the hello and goodbye song in a Kindermusik class becomes a ritual when we sing the same song each week. The familiarity and consistency of these songs lets the children know what’s coming, and so they eagerly ready themselves for fun and learning.

Rituals and routines shape a child’s behavior and development in a stable, secure and loving manner. Think bath time, cleanup time, bed time, family nights, Sunday morning waffles, summer vacations to the lake.  There is no shortage of research to suggest that routines and rituals are vitally important to the well-being and positive mental health of any child.

We can never underestimate the affect of the emotional imprint of loving routines and rituals in a child’s life, and the positive feelings they evoke in years to come. There is no shortage of research to suggest that routines and rituals are vitally important to the well-being and positive mental health of any child. What are some of your favorite memories of childhood? They likely involve a ritual or routine, which you may have repeated with your own family.

-posted by Miss Analiisa, who now knows that her morning cup of tea is not really about the caffeine; it emotionally prepares her to face the day. So, drink up!

Image: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The special thing about this book is that it has excerpts from real moms who documented how they were feeling week by week as their baby was growing. They would also document what their babies were doing as the weeks were going by as well. Again, for me, this was reassurance to know that each baby has different temperaments and is going to grow differently.

Miles at 5 weeks.

Here’s an example: I remember when Miles hit the 5 week mark. He was very fussy and it was very hard to get him to sleep. He would put up the greatest fight to go down and sometime he never made it down. He just cried the whole time until his next feeding.

This is when I picked up The Wonder Weeks and started reading as fast as I could! Well, wouldn’t you know, 5 weeks is when babies have their first fussy time, which leads into a ‘magical leap forward’.

After we made it through the 5^th week, both my husband and I realized that Miles was actually responding to music and he was starting to notice and play with his hands! He had started showing off his new skills that he was processing through during his fussy time.  What a pleasure to be able to watch and participate in his learning.  We were able to enjoy this because we knew what to expect.

Another thing that has been helpful about  The Wonder Weeks, is that there is a graph in the beginning of the book that charts out predicted fussy times. I’m a visual person, so this is very nice. I can quickly flip to this chart and see where Miles fits age-wise and see if he is in a sunny period (his personality is shining through) or a stormy period (more fussy than normal).

Here is one last example: Miles has been really cranky lately. I’ve stopped telling people how many weeks he is because I just can’t keep track. So, when people ask how old he is I’ll say 3 ½ months instead of weeks. But because he has been so cranky lately, I decided to count the weeks and check the chart in this book. Sure enough, Miles is in a stormy period and things are changing.

Miles has been very testy when it comes to sleeping. He has been having a really hard time going down and we can’t figure it out. He also doesn’t like my husband putting him down. He will cry and cry and cry with Casey, but then I’ll take him and he’ll quiet right down. This process has been really rough for both Casey and I because Casey feels rejected and I feel like I don’t get a break.

Miles at 17 weeks.

After counting how many weeks old Miles is, 17 weeks, he falls smack in the middle of a fussy time. I should’ve known! So, I just opened the book to refresh my memory about some of the changes that are going to be happening to Miles and about every description in the book is exactly what Miles is going through. Trouble sleeping, being cranky, shyness of strangers, entertaining him while he is awake; all of these things are written in this book and documented by the Moms who participated in journaling what their child was doing during this time. Talk about not feeling alone!

I am so grateful for this book, The Wonder Weeks. It has helped me a lot with being patient with my baby and myself. It will be a go-to book for me as Miles grows and gets older.

-posted by Miss Anna, who will be recommending this book to every Mom that she knows, and thinks that if you get the chance, you should check it out.

People have recommended books galore for us to read, Baby Wise, The Baby Whisperer, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, Happiest Baby On The Block and the list goes on.  Being the new mom that I am, I figured that I should start reading up on some of these so I can know what I’m doing, right?

Newborn Miles (before the fussies start)

Well, I remember my second day alone with Miles and my mom had said she was headed over to help and hang out. As soon as she opened the door to our apartment, I burst into tears! It had been an awful day the day before and a really tough night. I was so ready for some reinforcements by the dawn’s early light!

While being able to process out loud some of my thoughts, I realized that I was carrying a ton of weight on my shoulders about how Miles should conduct his days and nights. All of these books were telling me how to do things and I was thought that I was gleaning from all of them. I would read a book and then try to put into practice what they had ‘suggested’.

Finally, I realized that my sweet baby boy did not fit into any book! He is his own little person and he has to figure out a schedule of his own. His tummy will tell him when he is hungry and his eyes will tell him when he is tired.  And as for being a mom, I had to trust my instincts and listen to my baby.  So, I returned all the books to the various friends and libraries and set out on my own to figure this new thing out!

With all of this new information being thrown my way, I did retain some. One book, however, I pick up and read as Miles grows. This book is called The Wonder Weeks. I have to say, this book is such a lifesaver to me! If anything, this book gives me peace of mind that whenever I couldn’t and can’t figure out what is going on with my new little one, he is more than likely growing. And with that, comes a whole bunch of changes in behavioral patterns.

This book covers the 10 fussiest phases in a baby’s first year and a half. Through these fussy phases come wonderful leaps forward in a baby’s development. He learns new skills through these fussy times and is proud to show them when they are through the storm.

If anything, this book taught me to let go of having control. To know that if Miles is in a proven ‘fussy time’, that his normal day to day patterns might be a little off. So if he wants to eat every 2 hours and sleep for 4, it’s ok. If he is staying awake for 3 hours at a time, it’s ok. If he is crying and clinging to me, it’s ok (even if I’m totally annoyed with this!).

-posted by Miss Anna, who will tell you the rest of the story (aka “magical leaps forward”) tomorrow.

In Spring and Summer, the outside world is chock full of colors, smells, tastes, sounds, and things to touch. By this time of year, socks and shoes are back on, mittens cover little fingers, and hats muffle noises.

Did you know that together, hands and feet have over 40,000 touch receptors? Pull off those socks and mittens and take advantage of those 40,000 learning possibilities! Here are some ideas:

Note: All of these work equally well for hands or feet. A tablecloth/oilcloth on the floor or bathtub work well for the feet activities, and a highchair tray or wax paper on a table is a perfect place to contain the mess made by experimenting little hands. Be sure to talk about what your little one is “feeling” (slippery, soft, rough, smooth, scratchy, bumpy).

• Squirt shaving cream or whipped cream onto feet, or in little mounds on a high chair tray for exploration.
• Put dried beans or breakfast cereal in a box or plastic tub. Place packing peanuts or crumpled paper in the other box. Let your little one stomp and jump and kick away. (With your help, a non-walker can do this, too.)
•  Make a box of ribbon and fabric scraps of various textures (satin, grosgrain, fleece, burlap, vinyl) for exploration.
• Take those ribbons and scraps of fabric, add some cotton balls, and put them on floor for your little one to crawl or walk across.
• Cook noodles, oatmeal, rice or jello. Name the different textures as you play with them.
• Mix cornstarch and water until you get a goop about the consistency of glue.  Add food coloring if you wish. This is a non-toxic mixture, so no worries if a little bit gets eaten.

This is not the time to try and contain the mess! Frequently, the messier the experience, the more is learned. Think about it – the more touch receptors (and other senses) that are involved, the stronger and more permanent the learning will be.

-posted by Miss Analiisa, whose favourite sensory activity involves sand between her toes.

Brain Rules for Baby

This Seattleite and UW professor opens his book by debunking a few of the parenting myths we have come to believe.  Taking on these preconceptions and misconceptions, Dr. Medina uses the latest in research (only peer-reviewed and successfully replicated) to fill the next nearly 300 pages with specific strategies towards raising a smart and happy child.

One thought-provoking and foundational insight having particular application to our Kindermusik classes is Medina’s proposition that the fundamental job of the baby’s brain is not to learn, but to survive!  “We do not survive so that we can learn.  We learn so that we can survive.”

Hence, our fundamental job as parents and teachers is not so much to provide a steady stream of baby educational dvds, flashcards or early childhood French lessons, as it is to provide an environment of safety where learning can happen. When the brain feels safe its busy neurons are free to complete the thousands of connections needed to fully wire the brain….but not until! 

So what are some of the things that affect the safety level of our children?

*Attachment – From the birth canal babies are looking for attachments, their brains acutely attentive to the care being received.  If essential needs are being met and healthy bonding (lots of touch and “face” time!) is occurring there is a positive outcome, if not, there is another outcome.

*Stress levels – A stressful environment (angry or emotionally violent, exhibiting relational/marital conflict) signals to baby a lack of safety. Dr Medina does a fantastic job of pinpointing and addressing particularly prenatal stress and marital conflict.  He provides solid insights to bring about change to both areas.

In our Kindermusik classes our first and primary goal is to signal “this is a safe environment” to all children.  From the welcome song where one discovers he or she not only “belongs” to this community, but is recognized as a valued individual, to the snuggle time where we turn back to receive the gentle care of a loved one, we sing and dance and snuggle our way to a place where learning can thrive and happy neurons connect at an alarming rate!

Take a moment for this online parenting quiz and discover what parenting myths you may be holding dear!

-posted by Miss Colleen, who suddenly realizes how grateful she is to have been born into a nearly television free world….Ah, the benefits of age!

This final chapter in Medina’s book is on the innate exploratory nature of human beings. It starts at birth.  Babies are little scientists, he explains.  Their behavior from the womb is driven by their curiosity.  He describes how he did an experiment with his newborn, discovering that this little baby would imitate his dad when he stuck out his tongue—at 30 minutes old.  Mirror neurons residing in the brain are “cells whose activity reflects their surroundings.” In other words, our brains have cells that allow us to quickly imitate a behavior we have seen for the first time. That’s some fast track learning.

But according to Medina, our brains are meant to continue to explore for a lifetime. “Researchers have shown that some regions of the adult brain stay as malleable as a baby’s brain, so we can grow new connections, strengthen exiting connections and even create new neurons, allowing all of us to be lifelong learners.” Most of us know some of these amazing senior citizens whose brains can run circles around their juniors.  My aunt was one of those. Curious until her body failed, she was a classic addicted-to-learning person. And she was so fun to be around because she was so alive.  She asked questions and made interesting observations and had great sense of humor too.  Her brain was making new neural connections until it quit.  I’m convinced of it.

The fuel for all learning is curiosity.  Medina points us back to children. They are inherently curious. They are constant learners. During most of their early years, they are “little scientists,” Medina explains. They are asking questions, forming hypothesis, conducting experiments, noting the results and repeating them.  For example: What will happen if I push my bowl of spaghetti off the edge of the tray?  There it goes!  That was fun. I got a lot of attention and I liked how the sound and the way the stuff flew. I wonder what will happen if I do that again?

A sense of wonder or curiosity is the final subject of Medina’s book. He believes it is the most important brain rule of all!  As a research scientist and educator, his passion is learning.  He was encouraged by his mother to stoke the fuel of his curiosity, and he has. And he wants us to as well, in how we raise our children, run our businesses and develop our education system. If we follow the science of brain rules, we’ll find joy, he concludes.

“For little ones, discovery brings joy. Like an addictive drug, exploration increases the need for more discovery so that more joy can be experienced. It’s a straight up reward system that, if allowed to flourish, will continue into the school years. As children get older, they find that learning not only brings them joy, but it also brings them mastery. Expertise in specific subjects breeds the confidence to take intellectual risks. If these kids don’t end up in the emergency room, they may end up with a Nobel Prize.”

Thanks for a great book, John. I learned a lot!

-posted by Donna Detweiler, who finds homeschooling is a sneaky way to keep on learning as an adult.

Here are a few ideas to stimulate our thinking about finding music events outside-the-home in our communities.

Kindermusik classes are outstanding once-a-week classes that provide your child with a musical experience with “home-work” (really, “home-play”) and resources (CD’s, musical instruments, books and activity guides) to keep music a focus of your child’s life all week long.

Libraries usually provides a few concerts for kids throughout the year.  In addition, the library has the information about what other concerts and music events are happening in the area. Asking questions will get us plugged into the resources for our music quest.

Public schools perform throughout the year.  The high school concerts can be good enough quality and the musical selections are most often classics. Another benefit is that kids get to see kids performing, giving them a vision for their own musical involvement.

Community colleges also have concerts open to the public that are free or low cost, usually with an increase in quality as the students are older.

Churches have been a harbinger of great music for centuries. Today many churches are still active music venues.  Not only do they often have their own semi-professional choirs or bands, but they often invite other performers in for special concerts.  Around the holidays, churches are the best place to find free musical events to attend or to be involved in. Special Christmas choirs welcome children.  Some churches offer free or low cost musical lessons.  The internet can help us search for these opportunities locally.

Local symphonies commonly offer student ticket rates or special children’s events.  These folks know that their survival depends on the next generation falling in love with classical music.  As a community organization, their goal is to get their music out to the public, not be exclusive. So ask for a discount or scholarship if needed!

Bookstores like Third Place Books and Barnes and Nobles offer free musical events all year long.  During long winter days, these concerts can save the day.  Their schedules are often posted or printed for busy parents to take along, or available on the internet.

Summer concert series are just about done for the season.  In most communities, we can find a free outdoor concert at least one day of the week, if not more.  My friend’s community combined their concerts with the farmers markets.  Any place people gather in the summer, people are likely to include music.

With a little planning, our kids can have a rich musical experience.  Such a variety is available whether we’re investing big money, or living on a shoestring in a down economy. Our children’s lives can be enriched as we dish up a good serving of music daily, whether at home or outside.

-posted by Donna Detweiler, who is encouraged that a child’s musical diet doesn’t need to be skimpy even in lean economic times!

When I heard about this messy movement, it captured my attention.  Are my standards too high I wondered?  Am I bowing to the gods of neatness when my time could be better spent elsewhere?  Mind you, we’re not talking about dishes left in the sink for days, or filthy bathrooms. We’re talking about how picked up and beautiful we feel our house should look all the time.  You know that fleeting ideal– how the house looks when there are no people in it.  When the cleaning lady (me) has finished and no one is home yet, or before the guests arrive for our child’s birthday party with its festive table setting.

When I heard of the messy movement, I immediately thought of a few friends who I’ve always admired for their toleration of mess—no kidding! There’s Caroline (name changed just in case she doesn’t yet see being messy as an admirable trait.) When you enter her house, you notice that her main living room has a large pop-up princess fort and one of those crawling tunnels.  The Little Tykes kitchen is in the corner with the cookware and fake food strewn around.  Living in a chilly, rainy climate, these toys provide an indoor large motor play place for her children.  Because the living room has the most space, they use it for what their family needs most in this phase of life. On the occasions that grown-ups are over, the stuff gets moved, but on a daily basis, the living room is play central. That practical attitude gets a messy award!

Another friend of mine has a messy art table by their front door (which I blogged about earlier this year).  No hiding away this messy space in shame.  Art projects are not interrupted prematurely by a need to clean. Once in a while pens and paint jars are capped, but not before some have dried to a crust.  Piles of paper grace the floor and scissors, crayons and glue cover the table top.  A true messy haven for a budding artist, who paints and draws for hours each day I’m told.

The point of the messy movement, I would guess, is not mess for its own sake.  It’s a reaction to a perfectionistic mentality. When we have an unhealthy ideal of what our home should look like, we can be so driven to achieve this unrealistic goal that we drive ourselves and our families crazy.  We aren’t having any fun and neither is anybody else as we chase this illusion of a perfect home.

Parents, I have a proclamation for us:  Family life is messy.  Seems to me the messy movement is all about bringing balance to our lives.  There’s a time to clean and a time to be messy.  When our children are young, it is the time to be messy.  Celebrating messy is part of celebrating kids.  So let’s spend a bit less time restacking the Tupperware they’ve thrown into the cupboard (or whatever our neatness obsession is), and more time taking our kids out to the garden to play.  Afterwards we can cut some beautiful flowers to put in a vase for the kitchen table. We can clear a space for it in the middle.

-posted by Donna Detweiler who hears there’s plenty of time to have a clean house (and be lonely and wish it were messy again) after the kids are gone.