Last week I got one of those horrible colds. The kind where you just climb into bed, even though you have 3 children to home school and a business to run. The kind of cold that means the moment you lay flat, your head hurts and you can’t breathe. That bad.
I ended up watching a lot of Netflix on my iPad. And by the time I graduated to the couch I was sick of Netflix definition of my genre of choice – “Witty period pieces with a strong female lead”.
So, on to documentaries. I watched a Nat Geo series about the Amish. The Amish have always fascinated me; I don’t know why. I wish my husband could do wood working like that. But without having to grow a long beard and give up electricity and canning everything in sight. Never mind then. I’ll keep my IT-brilliant husband just the way he is.
Anyhoo… One show followed 5 Amish young people on a trip to the UK to stay with 4 families, each for a week during their Rumspringa. (Rumspringa, or “running around”, is the term used to describe the period of adolescence Amish experience starting at around age 16, before they make the decision whether or not to join the church, characterized by an increase in social activity, and leaving the “rules” behind in regards to behaviors like dress, alcohol, music, as they wish. They then give up their cars and Blackberrys and cigarettes when they choose to become baptized.)
I’m sure that’s not a complete answer; I just wanted you to know why Amish young people from the US could take a trip to the UK to stay with non-Amish, surf in the ocean, play electric guitars and go to a nightclub, all while being followed by a camera crew.
During the documentary, there was a girl in her early twenties that said something really profound. She and her family had left one of the strictest of Amish sects just the year before. (They choose to still live relatively simply and conservatively.) In their old way of life, there was no indoor plumbing, their clothing seams had to be sewn a particular manner, they could not plant flowers, and there was no history, geography or science taught in school, among a myriad of other rules.
She had never sung outside of church or made an art project. So at one house during their trip, the artist-daughter of the host family put a cup of acrylic paint mixed with glue in her hand, handed her a chopstick, and showed her how to drizzle this mixture onto paper and make a painting.
Just imagine making your first creative, beautiful thing at the age of 22. Something for which there was no right or wrong way to do it. This young woman’s face just lit up. Her countenance was alive and joyous, from the inside out. I think that by painting this picture, she experienced true freedom for the first time in her life.
And then she said, “I think too many rules stifle creativity.” That’s profound. And relevant. Rules are good. Boundaries are important. But with too many, creativity can be stifled. As a mom and teacher, I need to protect my children from being stifled.
Sometimes that means protecting them from my silly rules. Will my Kindergartener fail to learn her math facts if I don’t demand she do the full 3 pages of math on my agenda, when she really wants to just draw and write a lot today? No, you shouldn’t make your own chocolate milk because you might make a mess. You can’t wear that. It doesn’t match. You’re wasting the glitter! Let me cut your meat for you. You don’t do it right.
Silly rules that stifle creativity? I hope not in my house anymore. You want to compose your own piece of music on the violin and write it down? Go for it. You still have to practice your lesson music, but you can also spend as much time as you wish writing and playing “Land of Slowness”. (I kid you not, that’s the title.)
-posted by Miss Analiisa, who learned how to be a better parent after listening to the voice of reason coming from a most unexpected source.
QUICK LINKS
