My older two were working on schoolwork at the table.  Desperate to be like his older siblings, The Little Mister gave me a few grunts and signs indicating he wanted into his high chair.  I put him in and handed him some paper and a brown marker. I mean, how much damage can he do when he’s in a high chair? (Note: he’s already been banned from having markers anywhere else in the house).

I walked over to the fridge to pull out some ingredients and get a head start on dinner.  In the time it took me to do that, The Little Mister disappeared and The Naughty Magnet emerged.  It’s kind of like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde; it’s just a transformation that he somehow goes through.

The thing about The Naughty Magnet is that it’s hard to get upset at him.  I mean, I’m not naïve when it comes to children and disobedience.  After all, I have two other children and I was a less-than-compliant child myself once.  And I’m all for discipline. But when he’s in Naughty Magnet mode, it’s not necessarily disobedience.  The child attracts naughtiness like honey attracts bees.  For example, he can just walk by my utensil cabinet and the one tool he’s not allowed to touch (my meat mallet) jumps out of the drawer and into his hand.  It just happens.  Seriously. 

Anyway, so there I was, head in the fridge looking for the ground turkey.  I turned around to put it on the counter and glanced at The Little Mister.  But in his seat sits The Naughty Magnet, looking like he’d just walked out of our local tattoo parlor and proud of it. See the photo for proof of what The Naughty Magnet can do with 15 seconds and a brown marker. And yes, it just so happens that we were scheduled for our annual family photo just two days later.

Another day I’d sent the kids outside for “recess.”  My desk is right by the sliding doors and looks into the yard so that I can work and watch them at the same time.  I was happily catching up on some emails while the kids played.  The Little Mister was happily playing trucks on the other side of the yard.  The washing machine buzzed and I went into the next room to move laundry into the dryer.  I walked back into the room and The Naughty Magnet, cleverly disguised as The Little Mister, was sitting sweetly in a chair, smiling and waving as I walked in.  “Isn’t that cute,” I thought to myself.  “He must have gotten tired of playin…”

That’s when I saw the pile, yes, pile of wet, sandy dirt and an empty bucket tossed casually next to it, on the floor between my desk and the chair where he sat rocking.  His smile said “What?  Isn’t that where we keep our extra dirt?”  All I could think was “How did he get that bucket in the time it took me to move the clothes? He wasn’t even digging when I got up from my desk.”

What’s a mom going to do when these things happen?  Naughty Magnet or not, there are going to be things that just go crazy in a matter of seconds. Kids get dirty.  Kids act naughty.  Discipline is necessary, and an important part of child training, but perhaps the most important thing is a good, calm attitude.  Going ballistic, screaming, and yelling will only teach your children a bad habit-a habit of anger. 

I’m not saying to ignore naughty behavior.  I’m saying to control your response. You are the parent. Acknowledge that things like marker on body parts and sand on carpets happen.  Handle and respond to the situation in an appropriate and mature manner because you are training your child by your responses.  Child training happens through repetitive teaching and modeling of proper behavior.  Overreacting or “freaking out” will teach behavior that, when your child repeats it, you will find unattractive, undesirable and perhaps even embarrassing. 

Someday The Naughty Magnet will grow into a young man, and I want the pleasure of seeing one who is in control of his responses and anger, not one who, by observing his mother, learned to yell and shout over life’s messy accidents.  And what’s more, today’s frustrating events are the stuff of tomorrow’s funny stories.  Yes, one day you, too, will be able to laugh about dirt on the carpet.

-posted by Donna Venning, who is seriously considering buying stock in a cleaning products company, as she anticipates keeping them in business for years to come.

The following is from an interesting article I read in ScienceDaily:

Researchers have discovered that infants respond to the rhythm and tempo of music and find it more engaging than speech.

The findings, based on the study of infants aged between five months and two years old, suggest that babies may be born with a predisposition to move rhythmically in response to music.

The research was conducted by Dr Marcel Zentner, from the University of York’s Department of Psychology, and Dr Tuomas Eerola, from the Finnish Centre of Excellence in Interdisciplinary Music Research at the University of Jyvaskyla.

Dr Zentner said: “Our research suggests that it is the beat rather than other features of the music, such as the melody, that produces the response in infants. We also found that the better the children were able to synchronize their movements with the music the more they smiled.”

But, if you’ve come to a Studio3Music Kindermusik class, you already know that, and didn’t need scientific research to tell you so.

What I love about this research is that it enforces what we’ve learned about the brain. In the first 7 years of life, the brain’s main job is to organize itself. It does this through sensory integration. Sensory integration is the process of sorting, ordering and organizing sensory input (sounds, tastes, touch, visual input, smells, the sense of gravity and movement, and where the body is in space) so that the brain produces useful body responses, useful perceptions, and emotions.

When sensory integration is happening as it should, learning is also easy, and children naturally then seek to learn more complicated tasks. There is an inner drive in children to develop sensory integration. Remember how the babies in the research study smiled the more they could synchronize their movements to the music?

They experienced an “adaptive response”, which is a purposeful, goal-directed response to a sensory experience. The sensory input from his eyes, muscles, joints and vestibular system all are integrated and organized in his brain; therefore, he can make his body move in time to the music. And that ability to do so is very satisfying. So the baby smiles.

I think the key is this: Music helps organize the brain. When the body and all of the senses work together as a whole, adaptation and learning are easy for the brain. Most of our learning must occur first through the integration of our sensory systems. This provides the groundwork for later cognitive functions.

But, you already knew that, whether in your head or in your heart. And so does your little one. And that’s one of the reasons you come to class every week. Because music leads to learning, and learning leads to great satisfaction. What better gift can you give your children?

­-posted by Miss Analiisa, who loves to watch the babies wiggle in their grownups arms as they head toward the studio, cause they can’t get to Kindermusik fast enough, or the older ones running down the sidewalk towards the door, calling their teacher’s name!

We’ve heard, through our Kindermusik classes, how important it is to introduce your child to different styles of music. I’m guessing for most of you, opera has not been high on the list. The word “opera” can seem intimidating, but opera is simply a musical drama. Opera can offer many developmental benefits for your child and can be fun too! Introducing your child to opera helps increase language skills, teaches higher level thinking and creative problem-solving skills in real world situations, develops an appreciation for the arts, and stimulates the imagination.

How do you go about it? Let me help! I’ve been a Kindermusik Educator for a few years now, but have a degree in Vocal Performance studying opera. Just last year I performed with the Tacoma Opera company. I love children and I love music. Getting to introduce my love for opera to children is a passion for me. In fact, I did several operas in elementary schools while I was in college. They loved when we performed short Opera scenes for them, and they were the best audience a performer could ever have.

They laugh when it’s funny, show concern when it’s sad, and if there happens to be a big bad wolf in the story, they make sure to let the piggies know he is close by!! If you have school-aged children you might look into Northwest Opera in Schools, Etcetera (NOISE), and other groups that bring opera into the schools (Seattle Opera has had a program). You can set it up for them to come to your school!

For preschoolers, there are lots of ways to introduce them to opera. If you allow your child to watch a little TV during the day, there is a great show called Wonder Pets on Nick Jr. This is a show for preschoolers that has the feel of Operetta -a lighter version of opera with a frivolous story and some spoken dialogue. In Wonder Pets there is orchestral music throughout the show, and most of the dialogue is sung, rather than spoken.  You can watch it right here:

Since it’s not easy or wise to take a 2-5 year old to the opera, you can find videos of operas to watch at home, or books to read. Your children will be entranced by the big sets and costumes. They can dress up like the characters and use different voices for different singers – all things preschoolers love! Here is a link to a list of operas your children might enjoy and recommendations of productions to view.

The most practical way to introduce children to opera is through CDs. Now don’t just sit and listen, get up and let the music move you! There’s music in every opera that will make any child want to get up and run around the room. So, get up and move with them. The Humming Chorus from Madame Butterfly will have you flying like butterflies. There are softer musical moments that are fun to “fall asleep” to; snoring is a must! Here’s a great compilation of operatic works to march, dance and fly to.

You can also teach and experience emotions through music; a sad musical motif  can have you and your child weeping and wailing oh so silly-like. Use a scarf to dance around the room and weep and wail. Don’t forget to blow your silly noses! Light and happy sounding music will get you on your tip toes bouncing around the room. Of course, there are plenty of intense musical moments in opera that can be scary (show them your best scaredy-cat face), or creepy (creep around the room as if you are going to sneak up on someone). So don’t be afraid to move to the music, be silly and have a great time instilling a life-long love of music!

-posted by Miss Stacey, who leaves you with this quote: “To be completely and comprehensively educated means having a background in the arts. By introducing students to opera, we build and sustain cultural intelligence. … Passing on knowledge and understanding about the power of opera to communicate universal themes, ideas, and emotions ultimately enhances and betters our society….” – Dr. Joseph Piro, Associate Professor Curriculum & Instruction, Long Island University

A couple of weeks ago, my family took our first full-length road trip ever. It was, hands-down, the most fun we’ve had on vacation. I had been reading the book Kildee House to Rob. It was a Newberry Honor winner in 1950. Kildee House is about a shy stonecutter named Jerome Kildee, who retires to the redwood forest to be alone. He finds, instead, friendship for the first time in his life. He finds joy in the animals and children he learns to know, in spite of his self-imposed isolation. His quiet ways allow for the local animals and children to invade his space, and that is when the fun begins.

The book reminded me of my childhood trip through the Redwoods, and motivated me to give that same awe-inspiring experience with my own children. So the planning and mapping began.

Whenever I told other kids or teens that we were going to California to the Redwoods, without fail, they all said the same thing, “Disneyland? What are the Redwoods?” At the mention of “road trip, California and Redwoods” to other adults, I got responses like, “I remember when we went to the Redwoods when I was little. How fun!”

To me, the purpose of a road trip is the journey, not THE Destination. Now, I’m all for trips to places. San Diego has been a repeated vacation for us, and we’re planning a tour of the east coast in a couple of years. And my very favorite place in the world is Turkey. But on those kinds of trips, the focus is on getting there, and what you’ll do after you arrive.

So, in an effort to inspire your family to get on the road together this summer, here’s a few photos of the places we went:

Here's the headwaters of the Sacramento River. Yes, coming straight out of the mountain in about 5 spots. How often do you get to see that? Nathan filled up his water bottle. The water was so fresh and sweet.

Apparently, there must have been something in the chips and salsa they had just eaten at the restaurant next to the Sasquatch museum. Maybe they've got gold fever after coming out of that mine.

We took a long hike on some railroad tracks to this hidden waterfall. The cold water felt so good on our feet and faces. We also hiked to the cave behind another waterfall, where Black Bart had hid before a stagecoach robbery.

We spent two days in the Coastal Redwoods, hiking and tramping around. My kids all commented that all the ferns and giant trees reminded them of the planet Endor from Star Wars, and they kept trying to find what they thought was the actual filming location.

Banana slug hunting was a huge hit. We couldn't find any until just before we left the forest.

The Sea Lion Caves in Florence, Oregon are home to hundreds of sea lions, and is the biggest sea cave in the world. But, boy, was it stinky!

Where would you love to take your children on a road trip? What are your favorite road trips from your childhood? Leave a comment and let us all know. Maybe your memories will inspire a family to get in the car together this summer, even for a day or two.

-posted by Miss Analiisa, who says that yes, Legoland is fun. But the meadow full elk, or the group of redwoods growing into a cathedral spire, and the close-up view of Mt. Shasta are things that bring wonder and appreciation for the world, and that blows Legoland away.

 In a day of quick fixes, fast food, instant information and trophies earned by merely  showing up, perseverance seems an old-fashioned virtue.   And, indeed, who can value perseverance when time in its most abbreviated form is often the best loved commodity of the two?!  

Few have so dramatically demonstrated the worthy quality of perseverance as Derek Redmond in the 1992 Barcelona Olympics.   Enduring at least 13 operations on his Achilles tendon, Derek overcame much to appear in the 250 meter race that day, and many believe the world never saw his full potential on the track.   But what they did see that day was the love, the commitment and the perseverance of a parent/child team as Derek and his father hobbled across the finish line following a serious mid race hamstring injury.    Subsequently, Derek turned his skills and energies to coaching and motivational leadership, preparing a new British team to bring home the medals in the 2012 Olympics.

 “Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other”, noted the 19^th century American priest, Walter Elliott.   Parenthood, however, IS a long race full of many short races with ever changing scenarios and roles.   Just when our newborn falls into a regular napping or feeding pattern, it changes.   Potty training a toddler seems eternal.   Will our child ever use silverware or master the times table?   Suddenly it’s the periodic table…and, oh no, they’re driving!   

As it is with most character development, our role as parents is usually best accomplished through modeling.  Our children need to see US persevering to accomplish a goal, persevering through a difficulty, a loss or a fear.   When we have developed or ARE developing a particular character quality ourselves, we are best able to pass it along to our children.

We have limitless opportunities to strengthen our personal perseverance, as well as our child’s, to hang in there rather than throw in the towel, to demonstrate the value of encouraging, committed relationships, to choose to go on after defeat or failure, to go one mile more.   And with every small step forward comes the opportunity to celebrate.   Cheer the victories by the moment, the hour, the day, the week!  Exercised with a generous amount of patience, supplemented by healthy and encouraging friendships, honest feedback, and wrapped in unconditional love, the quality of perseverance can become a core strength of every family.   

So, eyes open!   The opportunities are all around you.   Watch for ways to stretch personally, and for that place where your child is learning something new, adding to a previous accomplishment, refining a behavior, overcoming a difficulty.   The character quality of perseverance will not only aid both of you in maximizing your unique gifts, becoming all you were designed to  be, but it will also carry you successfully through most of life’s rough waters.

-posted by Miss Colleen, who is grateful for both a father and a husband who modeled perseverance in spades!  “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”  -Winston Churchill  

I was making two dinners at once, plus preparing lunch for the next day (ultra-multi-tasking).  One recipe called for lemon juice, which I keep in a large jar in the back left of my fridge.  So I opened the fridge and pushed aside a bottle of something that was in the front of the shelf, keeping my hand on whatever it was to peer behind it. I saw yogurt, olives, feta cheese, salad dressing, vitamins and jam.  No lemon juice. 

So I pushed the bottle that was in my hand to the other side of the shelf and looked on the right side of the fridge; just cartons of milk.  Where was the lemon juice?  I always keep it on the top shelf toward the back left.  I pushed the “random bottle” in my hand back in front of the milk and peered in, getting frustrated.  The lemon juice jar would only fit on the top shelf so I knew it couldn’t be anywhere but on that shelf and I needed it now.  I could hear the garlic sizzling on the stove top, waiting for the lemon juice to be added.

I stared to stand up and call out an accusation of “Who took the lemon juice?” when I looked at the bottle that I’d pushed back and forth and was “holding” in my hand while I looked for the lemon juice. Yep, you guessed it…it was the jar of lemon juice itself.  I was so focused on it being in the “back left” of the fridge that I hadn’t even noticed that the very thing I needed was in my hand.

After rolling my eyes and saying a silent “thank you” that I hadn’t yelled at some innocent person (my husband) about the missing juice, I thought about how often something is right before my eyes but I become so focused on the long view that I loose sight of what’s right in hand.

Parenting can be this way. We can become so focused on our long range goals for our kids that we forget about the here and now.  Don’t get me wrong– I think we have to have long-range goals for our children.  Perhaps they’re academic (already eyeing a particular college), moral (instilling a particular religious belief), financial (wanting to raise a child who will be self-sufficient) or physical (training them in a particular sport).  For others, the goal of parenting may simply be “getting them out of the house in one piece at age 18” or getting them through the teen years “without strangling them.” 

Sometimes our focus is on the “end” of a season or time in our lives.  “When they’re finally potty-trained I’ll be able to…” or “When the turn five, things will be better…” is a common mom-thought and can become a goal that we’re focused on.

Serious or silly, years away or just a season of life away, where is your focus?  I encourage you not to become so focused on the long range or “someday” that you forget what you have in hand now.  You have a precious, unique opportunity today – to spend time being silly with your child, rolling on the floor, playing their favorite game for the tenth night in a row, answering their endless slew of questions, talking about what’s important to them (even if it’s about toy trucks, the names of the Transformers, or the large collection of stuffed kitties), fixing their veggies, cutting their food, wiping their noses and singing Farmer Jason.  These are precious times and will be over before you know it.  And you can’t get them back.

 Your child’s future – the long range – might be what you’re focused on, but take time to realize that the goal of parenting—enjoying each day with your child– is already in your hand.  Don’t push it aside looking for something in the back of the fridge.

-posted by Donna Venning, who knows that the cleaning, cooking and chores will always be there, but her five year old won’t be.