Life skills (aka “chores”)

By the time I was in Junior High, my chores included cleaning, laundry (and ironing!), milking the goats, hauling wood for the fireplace, working in the garden, and cooking full meals for my family. Can you tell I grew up in a rural area?

As much as I really didn’t like all those chores, what I was really learning were life skills. Good life skills are what enabled me to move to New York City on my own at 18 and survive.  (Though I admit that the time I got on the wrong train and ended up at Flatbush Avenue instead of the Upper East Side and didn’t get mugged or worse was luck, though it was life skills that told me NOT to get off the train!)

My children have it way easier than I did (though I’m positive every parent says that). We live in the city (so nothing to milk), we have a house cleaner who comes once a week, and I rarely iron, let alone make my children do so.

As my oldest just turned 11, and is on the cusp of adolescence, I knew I had to really start thinking about the process of parenting with the goal of letting him go.  His frontal lobe (and therefore his ability to make decisions taking into account all the long-term consequences) won’t be fully developed until he is 25, but he’s going to be ready to fly the nest long before then. (I hope!)

Although I can’t control his brain maturity, I can help him to develop life skills – aka “chores”. As I made a list of the skills he should master, it was overwhelmingly long. So, I decided to pick 4 this year, working alongside him until he’s competent, and only then adding another.

Below I’ve made a list of some life skills that every child should know, divided by age range. It’s by no means exhaustive, but meant to be a jumping off point for you. As well, keep in mind that every child develops at a different rate, and yours may be able to master some skills earlier and some later. And that’s perfectly normal.

Toddlers
How to pick up toys
How to wash hands
How to get dressed
How to come when called
How to “freeze” when told to stop
How to make a bed in the morning

Preschoolers
How to set the table
How to stir and mix, how to cut with a blunt knife
How to take sheets off the bed
How to put sort dirty and clean laundry
How to put clean clothing away
How to take on and off shoes and coat (buttons, zipper, Velcro)
How to fold towels and washcloths

Early Elementary
How to take care of a pet
How to clean the bathroom
How to answer a phone call
How to put away clean dishes
How to help put groceries and the bags away
How to clear the table and rinse the dishes
How to write a thank you note

Mid-Late Elementary
How to load the dishwasher
How to do laundry
How to fold clothes
How to vacuum
How to change sheets on a bed
How to prepare simple recipes
How to sew on a button or mend a small tear

-posted by Miss Analiisa, who can truthfully say that she had to walk to the school bus in the snow UPHILL both ways!